Honestly

I have been trying to think of something cute, fun, and exciting to blog about today...

but

Instead I decided to be simple and honest.

I have always struggled with caring about what others think of me. Whether it is through appearance, actions, accomplishments, etc...I tend to be a people pleaser. I have always had a hard time admitting struggles and showing insecurities. In fact, I can be really good at putting on the "I'm great" face, and playing the part. 

Growing up as a youth pastor's daughter, and now being a youth pastor's wife...

I have felt like I should always have things together, especially with my relationship with God. 

I love God. He is my savior, and I want to live my life for Him.

But I struggle. 

I do not always feel close to God.

 I do not always want to read my bible.

I struggle with fear and insecurity.

I struggle with stepping out in faith.

I do not like to feel uncomfortable or awkward. 

I can be very selfish.

I could go on...

My point in saying all of this is not a woe is me type of thing. It's not even really about me. I want you to know that I am FAR from perfect. I want you to know that you are not the only one that struggles. 

God wants us to be honest. He wants us to admit our need for Him. He wants us to share our struggles with each other, so that healing and truth can shine through. 

In all my weaknesses and struggles, I know that I am still a Child of God. His love for me never changes. His mercies are new every morning. 

Even when I don't feel close to God, I cling to His promises which I KNOW are true. I pray that we can do that together today.

"we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." ~Romans 8:37-39